Dating a man who is too busy

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About a month ago I asked him if we could ever be more than friends and he said he’s not going to answer that. He’s played the entire thing out in his head and all he can see is Doom and Gloom! A few years ago I was in a similar boat as you are today. By asking him to be more than friends, you ask him for a greater commitment.I’ve asked repeatedly if there is a way we can work around his schedule to see each other.But he has point-blank refused, he just says he can’t give me any times as he apparently doesn’t know when he’ll have time off.

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Everything’s great when we spend time with each other. It doesn’t mean he’s a bad guy who “uses” women and is totally selfish; it just means he has other priorities in life right now (like his career.) He’s afraid that if he says yes to your proposal with the little he can offer, he will fail to live up to your relationship expectations. At this stage of the game you’re excited to see him whenever he can make the time. Suddenly you’re feeling sad and neglected when he doesn’t make time for you, rather than appreciating him for when he does.

We do get intimate when we see each other and at other times we just hang out. The little he is able to give you is enough to satisfy and make you happy. The dynamics will grow tense and the innocent joy you felt with each other will drown in the overwhelming tides of expectations and disappointments.

We’ve been on six dates and have progressed intimately quite rapidly, but I have a couple of issues with him and the relationship.

One is that he cannot fit me into his schedule at all.

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